Punjabi Marriage

Marriage holds great cultural significance in Punjab, symbolizing the union of two families. This bond, typically between a man and a woman, is governed by various customs, laws, and social expectations that define the roles and responsibilities of the couple. Traditionally, marriage has been seen as a crucial institution in preserving societal values.

Sikh Marriage Registration: Although the Anand Marriage Law was established in 1909, it did not originally include a formal marriage registration process. Instead, marriages were often registered under the Hindu Marriage Act, 1955. However, the Anand Marriage (Amendment) Act of 2012 clarified this process. Under this law, couples married according to the Anand Marriage Act do not need to register their marriage elsewhere. A marriage performed in a Gurdwara is considered legally valid, with the certificate issued by the Gurdwara serving as legitimate proof of the union.

Pre-Wedding Rituals

Rokka (Pre-Engagement)
Rokka is a key ritual that marks the formal acceptance of the relationship between the bride and groom’s families. It is a moment of celebration, where both families exchange gifts as a sign of goodwill.

Kurmai (Engagement)
The engagement is an important event in a Punjabi wedding. The bride is adorned with a Phulkari, often a beautifully embroidered piece passed down through generations. Her family members assist in dressing her, and she is presented with jewelry. A small dot of henna is applied to her palm for good fortune. The ritual concludes with the exchange of rings, and the bride’s father blesses the groom by marking his forehead with a tikka.

Sangeet
The Sangeet ceremony, traditionally hosted by the bride’s family, has evolved to include both sides of the family in modern times. It is an evening of singing, dancing, and merrymaking, often accompanied by a DJ, with guests enjoying music and a festive dinner.

Mehndi
The Mehndi ceremony involves the application of henna on the bride’s hands and feet, as well as on the female relatives of both families. During this ritual, a basket of Bindis and Bangles is passed around for women to select accessories that match their wedding outfits. The bride’s future mother-in-law typically sends this basket.

Saha Vadhaana
This is the ritual in which an auspicious date for the wedding is selected by a Pandit, ensuring the timing is propitious for the couple.

Saha Chithi
In this tradition, a letter is delivered from the bride’s home to the groom’s, indicating the wedding date. In earlier times, a mediator would carry this letter, helping to formalize the wedding arrangements.

Wedding Celebrations

Jaggo Ceremony
The Jaggo is a lively and joyous pre-wedding event where the bride’s family dances and sings late into the night. Brass or copper vessels, known as Ghadas, are filled with mustard oil and decorated with clay lamps, and are carried on the head by the bride or groom’s maternal aunt. Another woman carries a stick with bells, shaking it as the group moves from home to home, receiving sweets and drinks along the way. The procession is accompanied by dancing, fireworks, and celebrations, creating a festive atmosphere throughout the night.

Rituals at the Bride’s Home

Choora
The wedding day at the bride’s home begins with the Choora ceremony, where the bride’s oldest maternal uncle and aunt play significant roles. The bride is gifted a set of red bangles, known as Choora, by her maternal uncle (Mama Ji). The bride’s family members, including her uncle, aunt, and close relatives, then tie Kaliras—traditional ornaments made of silver, gold, or gold-plated metal—onto the Choora as a sign of prosperity and good luck.

Vatna/Haldi
In the Vatna or Haldi ceremony, four diyas (oil lamps) are lit, and the bride sits facing them. Oil is poured continuously into the lamps, and the glow is reflected onto her face. A paste of turmeric powder and mustard oil, known as Vatna, is then applied to the bride’s body to enhance her beauty before the wedding. This ritual is also performed at the groom’s house. Following Vatna, the bride and groom are not allowed to meet until the wedding ceremony.

Ghara Gharoli
The bride’s bhabhi (brother’s wife) brings a decorated pitcher, or Gharoli, filled with holy water from a nearby temple. The bride is bathed with this sacred water before she gets dressed in her wedding attire. A similar ritual is performed at the groom’s house, where his sister-in-law brings the pitcher of water. The bride and groom’s wedding attire is typically gifted to them by their respective maternal uncles.

Rituals at the Groom’s Home

Sarvala
The Sarvala is a young nephew or cousin of the groom who dresses in a similar outfit as the groom. This individual is known as the groom’s caretaker and accompanies him during the ceremony. The Sarvala rides the mare alongside the groom.

Sehra
After the groom dons his wedding attire, a puja (prayer) is performed, and his sister ties a Sehra (a traditional headpiece) on his head. Following this, the groom is showered with gifts and money from the family as a gesture of good luck.

Surma Salayi
The groom’s bhabhi (brother’s wife) applies Surma (kohl) to the groom’s eyes to protect him from the evil eye.

Vaang Fadaan di Rasam
In this ritual, the groom’s sister hands over the bridle of the mare to the groom, a custom known as Vaang Fadaan. The groom then mounts the horse to travel to the wedding venue.

Jandi Kattan di Rasam
On the way to the wedding venue, the groom stops to cut a small piece of a tree called Jand to ward off the evil eye from the procession.

Rituals at the Marriage Venue

Milni
The Milni ceremony involves the formal introduction of senior male members from both families. Relatives of the bride and groom exchange garlands as a symbol of unity and respect. During this ceremony, the bride’s family gives Shagun (good luck tokens) to the groom’s relatives in order of their age.

Jaimala/Varmala
Following the Milni, the bride and groom exchange flower garlands (Varmala) in the presence of family and friends. The ceremony is filled with joy, with playful teasing and celebrations as the couple places the garlands around each other’s necks.

Kanyadaan and Phere in Hindu Marriage
The bride’s father offers his daughter to the groom in the Kanyadaan ceremony, symbolizing the transfer of responsibility. After this, the couple performs the Pheras (seven rounds) around the sacred fire (Agni), making vows for their shared life. The groom applies Sindoor (vermilion) to the bride’s hair parting, and ties the Mangalsutra (a beaded necklace) around her neck to signify their union.

Laavan at Sikh Anand Karaj
In Sikh weddings, known as Anand Karaj, the bride and groom walk around the Guru Granth Sahib four times while hymns composed by Guru Ram Das (Laavan) are recited. This represents the couple’s commitment to each other and the Guru’s teachings, as the center of their marriage.

Joota Chupai
During Joota Chupai, the bride’s sisters hide the groom’s shoes, and in a playful manner, demand a fee for their return. It is a fun tradition filled with laughter and joy.

Vidaai/Doli
The Vidaai marks the bride’s departure from her parental home. As a symbolic gesture, the bride throws puffed rice over her head to offer blessings to her parents. The bride bids farewell to her family, and her brothers or male cousins escort her to the groom’s family home. The bride’s relatives throw coins in her wake as a gesture of good fortune.

Post-Wedding Rituals

Pani Varna
In the Pani Varna ceremony, the mother-in-law holds a glass of water and circles it around the bride three or seven times. She then offers the water to the bride as a blessing, symbolizing her acceptance into the family.

Reception at the Groom’s House
After the wedding, the newlyweds are welcomed into the groom’s home in a ceremony called Pani Bharna. As part of the tradition, the bride kicks a container of mustard oil with her right foot before entering the house.

Chattian
During the Chattian ceremony, the bride and groom, along with their relatives, engage in a playful ritual where they gently hit each other with thin wooden sticks (chattian), typically performed between the bride and groom, or the devar-bhabhi (brother and sister-in-law).

Got Kanala
In this tradition, the bride eats with the groom’s family from the same plate, signifying her acceptance into her new family and her transition from her maternal clan to her husband’s family.

Phera Dalna
The bride and groom visit the bride’s parents the day after the wedding, usually accompanied by the bride’s brother, to complete this ritual.

Traditional Food Items

1. Chuhani: A dish served to a woman after childbirth, symbolizing nourishment.
2. Panjiri: A nutritious food given to women post-childbirth to regain strength.
3. Goi Munda: A thin bread distributed as Prasad when a boy is born.
4. Gadoura: A Prasad given after the death of an elder, typically distributed by wealthy families.
5. Bouhli: A curdled milk dish prepared using milk from a recently calved cow or buffalo, with sugar or jaggery.
6. Sattu: A beverage made from barley, often consumed for its health benefits.
7. Baklian: A snack made by boiling chickpeas with salt.
8. Ghunganian: A dish made by soaking and boiling corn cob kernels with salt

Punjab PCS Important Links

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